Presented without comment.

It might not get you where you need to go, but it will definitely get you somewhere. Or sometime.

Crispian Jago’s Dr. Who Tube Map. Click for the interactive version!

Katharina Fritsch’s Hahn/Cock, which will be erected on the fourth plinth in Trafalgar Square in 2013.  

Yves Klein called from the grave to report that he has just been raped by a German woman claiming to be an artist.

The Guardian has recently put up some useful interactive maps for travellers and locals alike. The first is a guide to Britain’s best budget eats, which they are continuously expanding. The second is the Enjoy England map—things to do throughout the country, with suggestions from readers. Some of the tips are quirky, but mostly it’s not the kind of stuff you’d find in a typical guidebook.

All of this seems extra appealing to me as I’m still stuck at home with the flu. Here’s hoping your weekend is slightly more exciting.

Hey, here’s a great idea: to help solve the budget crisis, the culture secretary has announced he will be axing the UK Film Council, funded by the National Lottery, which returns £5 for every £1 it spends.

In the 10 years that the Council has existed, it’s helped independent filmmakers create projects that studios simply wouldn’t fund, and it currently allows 35,000 people to call themselves employed in this terrible market. In addition to funding films like This is England, Nowhere Boy, Happy-Go-Lucky, Fish Tank, Man on Wire, St. Trinian’s, Bright Star and many more, the Council also assists in the worldwide distribution of foreign films, like Gainsbourg. This move has provoked outrage from workers in the film industry, directors, and lovers of film. It’s also, in my humble opinion, an incredibly stupid move, undermining the UK film market at a critical time.

If you’d like to sign the petition against the government’s decision, click here. Click the photo to join the FB group!

1. A long wait for rail replacement bus services.
2. Above-average temps, so a really long wait.
3. Filthy looks from England fans and maybe a snarky comment or two.
4. My first German pub in London.
5. A big crowd several hours before KO (Germans go early everywhere).
6. Schlenkerla beer, leberkaes, more Schlenkerla. Maybe more leberkaes.
7. Singing/cheering/horrible comments about the English in German. Several repeats of “54, 64, 90, 2010,” sung in progressively more drunken rounds.
8. The glorious return of Klose, and a healthy Schweini. Lamm being great as usual.
9. A useless Rooney.
10. Dejected England fans on the return trip, throwing me even more filthy looks.

I heard that guy on death row in Utah got to choose his own firing squad.

He chose Heskey, Rooney, Lampard & Gerrard.    

samuelfromtheshire:

My face when the BBC compared the England team to Space jam.

Robert Green is not having his best day.

British roof repair

I’ve been to the city before, which is a charming college town, and well worth a visit. This week is the annual Beer Festival, and I was determined to experience it before the weekend, when they typically sell out of the good stuff! Theoretically the Festival has hundreds of local beers and ciders to sample. That said, they have a great selection of German beers, most of which aren’t typically exported—and those are all I drank the entire day.

I had never been punting down the river before, and thought the late afternoon Festival break was the perfect chance to see the University from the water. It’s fantastic on a quiet day.

Unless you have some experience with punting, and excellent balance, I recommend leaving the work to the professionals. Many inexperienced punters crash into each other on the weekends, or have the trauma of their oars getting lodged in the mud and either stranding them on, or pulling them into, the water.

On the boat, I sampled traditional candies (sweets!) from my favorite candy store, Mr. Simms Olde Sweet Shoppe. The place is literally like the candy store at the beginning of Willy Wonka. If I had seen this as a kid, I would have gone nuts.

Some of the most beautiful parts of the University can be best viewed along the water. My school (or “Uni,” as they say in these parts) was admittedly quite beautiful, but I think few campuses in the world hold a candle to Cambridge.

Punting down the Styx.

Knigel Knapp, Monster Raving Loony Party candidate for Parliament representing Hackney North and Stoke Newington, has proposed introducing floating bikes to tackle the city’s traffic congestion problem. Of course, this would necessitate further canal construction, but that would have to be better than six more months of weekend Jubilee line closures! He further points out that floating bicycles would be particularly necessary as rising sea levels threaten to flood our fair city.

The manifesto of the Monster Raving Loony Party (don’t look at me!) also calls for the use of air conditioning units to be installed in buildings facing outward, to help combat global warming. Oh, and that candidates be permanently painted the color of their political parties.